Archive: Mischa Barton

The Daily Bikini

Mischa Barton bikini pics!
Mischa Barton bikini pics!

Mischa Barton in St. Tropez, France (6/2005)

NOTE: 18 more Mischa Barton bikini pics on PAGE 2 (CLICK HERE)

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CLICK HERE to jump to 18 more Mischa Barton bikini pics on PAGE 2

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Mischa Barton = FAIL

Mischa Barton dropped by her agent
Mischa Barton dropped by her agency

Mischa Barton was recently dropped by her agent. Why? Because she’s a no-talent ass clown. From the New York Post:

Mischa Barton, whose acting career has hit the skids, has new agents. A source told Page Six that Barton “was dropped by Creative Artists Agency because she hasn’t had any big roles since ‘The O.C.’ ” The wacky dresser got picked up by New York’s Paradigm Agency, said a spokeswoman, who added, “Mischa left CAA - she was not dropped.” (Source)

No big roles? What about Mischa’s breakthrough performance as the chick that that does nothing all day but sit around, get high, and debate the merits of peanut butter versus nutella. Oh, that’s not a movie role?

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Mischa Barton is almost too sexy

Mischa Barton definitely has cellulite
Mischa Barton in New York (6/12)

Remember those bikini pics from a few months ago showing Mischa Barton’s cellulite-ravaged thighs. Mischa and her rep claimed the photos were doctored even though it’s a known fact Mischa has the thighs of a 55-year-old widow from Long Island known as Doris. Well check out these pics of Mischa in New York last week. Doctored again? Well no actually. Because no one gives a fuck about Mischa Barton. Doctoring a photo takes a good five minutes — five minutes that could be better spent not caring about Mischa Barton. This bitch could walk naked through my living room holding cotton candy and I’d call all my friends to tell them I just saw the most delicious cotton candy.

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[Flynet]

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Mischa Barton is kinda sorta see through

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Mischa Barton in kinda sorta NSFW

According to Bauer-Griffin, Mischa is entering the Gramercy Park Hotel yesterday afternoon after a dentist appointment. She wore a see through shirt to the dentist’s office. Your move Paris Hilton.

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[BauerGriffinOnline]

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Mischa Barton is hot, hot, hot! - UPDATE

Mischa Barton has cottage cheese thighs
Mischa Barton in Australia (5/3)

Topless? Hooray! Pantless? Boooooooo! I admit I’m not the best looking guy (I’ve only finished as high as second in the hot abs contest at the county fair), but what the hell? Thighs aren’t supposed to look like that when you’re 22. Clearly Mischa made a deal with the devil in her youth. “I’ll make you famous, but one day your thighs will make that Celebslam dude throw up his Egg McMuffin.”

Mischa Barton topless bikini pics!mischa-barton-toples-1.jpgMischa Barton has cottage cheese thighs

UPDATE: Now 200% more topless!

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Mischa Barton is in a good mood

Mischa Barton bikini pics
Mischa Barton bikini pics! (Malibu - 4/9)

Mischa Barton celebrated the plea deal she just struck for her December DUI by hitting up the beach today in L.A. In related news, I didn’t go to the beach today to celebrate the plea deal I struck because I didn’t get a DUI in December. Winner: Me.

Check out PacificCoastNewsOnline.com for the full set of 19 photos!

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Mischa Barton is free!

Mischa Barton mug shot
Pardon her appearance, she didn’t take her morning Xanax

Mischa Barton will plead no contest to DUI at her arraignment today in a Beverly Hills court. The actress will be placed on three years unsupervised probation, pay a fine of $1700, and have to attend a three month alcohol-education class. People magazine says:

In addition, a marijuana possession charge against the actress will be dropped, due to the small amount found. Another charge of driving without a license will be reduced to an infraction, according to the source. The terms of the plea deal, negotiated by Barton’s lawyer Anthony V. Salerno, are expected to be signed off on by the court Thursday. Such a deal is common for first-time offenders. (Source)

I think they mean “first time offenders who have IMDB pages”. Because if an ordinary guy like me was arrested for DUI and pot possession, you better believe I’d do more than just pay a fine. Unless I was lucky enough to get Judge Williams. She’s a sucker for a guy with a hot body. A flex of my biceps here, a flick of my hair there and voilà, case dismissed.

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The rumors are true

Mischa Barton needs a tan
Mischa Barton in L.A. (2/26)

Mischa Barton has been living in the center of the Earth for the past year.

Mischa Barton is a Jamie Lynn fanMischa Barton with magazinesMischa Barton not drinking, not drivingMischa Barton is soberMischa Barton walking in LAMischa Barton likes porn

Mischa Barton is a ghostMischa Barton is almost clearMischa Barton white skinMischa Barton is white as hellMischa Barton is white as white can beMischa Barton needs some sun

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Mischa hearts drugs

Mischa had pot on her
Mischa Barton (back seat) leaving the West Hollywood Sheriff’s Station yesterday

According to a “West Hollywood police source” Mischa Barton had weed and pills on her yesterday morning when she was arrested for DUI. TMZ says:

A West Hollywood police source tells TMZ that when she was arrested, Mischa Barton blew a .12 on her breathalyzer test, smoked marijuana that day (which cops found) and had prescription drugs in her possession — that weren’t hers! Barton was popped at 2:45 AM Thursday in West Hollywood. Cops pulled her over after they witnessed her “straddling two lanes of traffic and failed to signal when making a turn.” (Source)

Mischa blew a .12? Sounds to me like she was doing it wrong. If she really wanted to get out of the arrest, she should have blown a “5-0″. How do you think Britney Spears has never gotten a DUI? Scene plays out the same every time. Britney’s asked to walk in a straight line and count down from 20 in increments of 2. By “16″ the officer’s zipper is down and by “8″ she’s being told she can drive home as long as she doesn’t hit too many more stop signs.

Mischa Barton mug shot
Mischa Barton mug shot

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MISCHA BARTON ARRESTED FOR DUI

Mischa Barton DUI bust
Mischa Barton arrested for DUI

2007 has proven to be a banner year for celebrity DUIs. And it just got one better. Mischa Barton was arrested for DUI at 2:46 this morning in West Hollywood. The actress is being held on $10,000 bail. Last night Mischa said:

No seriously, no seriously, no seriously, you’re like one of the coolest people I know, no I’m serious, I’m serious. You are. It’s bright in here. Hey it’s bright in here. Do you guys notice how bright it is in here. Yeah, I’m OK to drive.

Get it? That’s my impression of Mischa Barton drunk.

UPDATE: In addition to DUI, Mischa was popped for possession of narcotics and driving on a suspended license. Drugs? I just can’t believe . . . oh that’s right, I can.

Mischa Barton DUI arrest

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